My wife and I got married at the courthouse. Our marriage is between us and God (ignore the state) so we didn't need to gift others with a party. We've seen a dozen other couples that spent thousands and thousands on a wedding that divorced with debt. We take a trip to renew our vows every 10 years (went to vegas for 10 years, just us and elvis) Spend that money on SATs and then go on trips together in the future. Anyone that really loves you two will simply be happy for you and congratulate you for not making a culturally pressured financial decision.